Een verhaaltje van een tijdje geleden, maar daarom niet minder leuk. Voor de niet-IT-ers: jullie kunnen proberen te snappen waarom ITers dit leuk vinden, maar of jullie erachter komen is een andere zaak. Geeky stuff this…

Bite2 is coming, so it was time to secure some unofficial servers. The COPIL01 was too well known, so I decided to reinstall the long forgotten VBEGN050, the server from hell. Firing up this beauty, I recalled some of the old stories: sneaking it out of the DC in MBs car, crashing it trying to install Linux, keeping it out of every monitoring activity at the DC, recovering data when Win2000 refused service, those were the days…

Installing Win2000 advanced server (unofficial version) was a quicky, no complications, appart from having to flip the 3 SCSI drives, bays 0 to 2, and having to ignore some critical errors when starting disk 0. I guess it’s nothing, Checkdisk turned up with “no serious harm done”. Enabled ISS: FTP and HTTP (8080) and SMTP. Now all that was left was Apache, Mysql and Php. Ripped the latest versions from the net, installed, configuered, started services, done.

Having now 5 screens on my desk, I thought this was a bit over the edge, I didn’t want the Overhead Layer asking questions. So I sneaked into the old server room, now deserted, and polled the network cable with my portable. Just as I had suspected, it was dead. Damn! The Freak from the DC had disconnected it when upgading to the new 100mbit network. While taking a leak I had a go at the patch room door, no joy. It was locked.

The annoying noise under my desk was becoming unbearable. I had to get rid of this headache. Normally jelling a little bit at the PCD (Project Coordinator Dude) would have helped, but he was not around, so, that was not an option. I had to get some network into there, and fast. Inquiries to the Think Team about them having a network connection that
they could spare, turned up negative. All connection were taken for their lousy portables with their even lousier software. As if they need it. I could put it under the DOC (Departamental Overhead Chick) desk, but sooner or later she would find out too. So the only option was to call the Freak from the DC. Risking my ass to be trown in his basement, I called… no answer. Damn! What now?

It was that geek with the glasses from Production Systems that came up with a brilliant idea. Seems the DO dude from the Pussy Department had a spare key. Whilsteling, I walked up to his desk, opened up the top drawer and there it was, a key…. Silently I sneaked into the patch room. BOFH style. There was a cable hanging loose, that must be the one. Seeking the router reading “vlan 177.*”, snap. Hole 24 was free. In and out in 15 seconds, I silently closed the door behind me, locking it. I shut down the Beauty under my desk, silence at last. I have to makesure that prick from TechSupport is not watching when I sneak the Beauty in the server room. Wow, she sure weighs a lot. The new transport dudes at the coffee corner gave me a strange look. As if they had never seen a server. Well, they probably never had. Connecting the keyboard, mouse, network and power supply cables, and click… I fired her up. God, I love the sound of SCSI disk reving up one by one. Pure geek pleasure.

Now, lets see if the VNC service is working the way it should. I didn’t bother to put a monitor there. “Connecting to vbegn050.emea.msds.volvo.net…” YES! The “session password” prompt. It works! Now all we have to do is make sure nobody remembers the Beauty when Bite2 arrives. I’m sure it will still take ages befor they ban all non-Bite2 computers. And God knows where our Server from Hell will be by then…